Depression is a stealthy emotional state that can be hard to diagnose or recognize because it has so many ways of showing itself. It can come upon you and you have no idea it is there. Those around you may find you the same as always, slightly different or totally out of your normal behavior.
Over the last few of weeks I finally realized that I have been in a depressed state for quite some time. After that recognition, I felt as though a veil had been lifted from my mind and weights had fallen from my shoulders.
This may not be something that a person in my position should announce on her blog about positive thinking and manifesting however I think it is. If I can help just one person recognize depression in themselves or a loved one, I have payed it forward.
Imagine, my family did not recognize it; neither did my friends. I knew something was wrong but I couldn’t put my finger on what it was. My normal energetic mode of being, slowly began to disappear.
The first of many areas in my life to suffer were my surroundings. I didn’t take care of my home and vehicles as I normally would. When my living space is in disarray, I am personally out of balance.
Yet another area that suffered was my interaction with people. I did not contact or interact with my family and friends as I normally did. I even stopped my weekly visits with my grandchildren and I would make excuses for not seeing them. I should have known something was wrong when I would spend 1 or 2 days in bed “catching up” on TV shows or sleeping until noon and I began to put on weight. I spent very little time with my daughter, who lives with me, and became irritated when she would come to talk with me.
I would make an appointment to meet with an acquaintance and would cancel or not even call or show up or I would “zone out” while I was with them. That is not the way I operate. I want to learn about others and do what I can to be of assistance. I am a stickler for being on time and if I can’t, I give plenty of notice. I began to be late or just on time.
I had not updated this blog or my column in weeks. I initially called it writers block when in reality I didn’t feel like writing. Again I should have known something was wrong because I love to write.
When thoughts of death and dying began to permeate my thoughts, I kept asking myself why was I thinking this way. From where were these thoughts coming? I had no intention of dying any time soon. Where had
Have you ever felt overwhelmed?
Beverly gone? I was in a state of depression even though I was still functioning. When it came to work, clients, and contracts I was my usual self however I began to doubt my abilities.
What I have described above are some of the classic symptoms of depression but I didn’t even consider it as a possibility.
Recently, I began asking myself serious questions about some areas of my life that I was neglecting. I wasn’t liking the person I had become. I slowly started making long delayed decisions and changes, one item at a time. It wasn’t easy. I literally had to program myself using “The One Command” and self-hypnosis to do things. I started with 10 minute projects around the house or resolving one personal issue and then another. I looked at my accomplishments and I felt good. This began the change back to the old Beverly.
Some may ask why I haven’t been to the doctor to get a medicine like Prozac or Zoloft or any of the other medications that are available. It is because I believe that we have the power to heal ourselves and I have knowledge and the tools that have been proven effective.
I realize that some people cannot get out of this state without having medication because the depression is deep or they have a physical problem. If I had found things weren’t working, I would have contacted my doctor for the necessary help.
The first thing I had to do was recognize that I was depressed and then I began to take the best action possible for me. I began walking on a regular basis, changed my diet and I am meditating (The One Command®) at least twice a day. I am cleaning out the clutter in all areas of my life (mental, physical and relationships). I am at the light at the end of the tunnel and it is shining brightly.
If you suspect you or a loved one is depressed go to WebMD.com for more information and then contact your Doctor or Clergyman and begin to get the help you need. You will be glad you did.
As you have believed, let it be done to you. Matthew 9:29
And It is So!
In Gratitude,
Beverly Fells Jones
The Silver Fox of Consciousness
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